elevators&physics

I know that in the actual function of an elevator there are many works of phsyics, mechanics, electronics, and, arguably magic. Very interesting stuff. (I'm lying.) BUT what actually interests me are the social behaviors in this overlooked modern stair erradicator.

When everyone crams into the lift at rush hour, like, say, gas particles in a balloon, you're all rubbin' up on each other and smelling eachother's breakfasts. As the lazy-asses on the first couple floors get out, everyone moves around to evenly dispense the newly acquired space and eventually it follows this law-of-physics-to-which-I-cannot-remember-the-name until there are as few as 2 people. At that point they generally will space as far from each other as possible. This is of coarse unless they are fucking- either on the DL, as a part of a recognized relationship, or at that very moment.

I also find it intruiging how elevators alter conversation patterns. Either you hurry up and finish your thought, then shut up, or you do the exact opposite and continue to chat at a counter-intuitively louder decibal so that everone now hears everything about your coffee/GYN appt/unfortunate date/morning commute ordeal.

Yesterday I rode down from floor 12 with a man whom I had never seen before but who insisted on continuing his phone call with a receptionist at a doctor's office for a very PRIVATE kind of appointment. Or at least it was private. Now me and various people from floors 8 and 5 know about Richard Kaye's *ahem* pee-pee troubles.

I guess my point is this. Get in only if you have 4 or more floors to travel, shut up, and get the hell away from me. Unless, of coarse, we are fucking.